Forgive the Unforgivable
by Bendleshnitz
Summary: It was my responsibility to give Harry what he wanted in order for him to forgive me. -Cousincest- -Head the warnings-


**Title:** Forgive the Unforgivable  
**Pairing:** Dudley Dursley/Harry Potter  
**Rating:** NC-17  
**Prompt:** #38 _I'll be your best kept secret and your biggest mistake._ Fall Out Boy, "Nobody Puts Baby in a Corner". by **wwmrsweasleydo**  
**Word count:** 1565  
**Beta:** **luvscharlie**  
**Warning(s):** Slash. Cousincest. Infidelity. Angst. Dry-humping. Inherited OCD (LOL).  
**Summary:** It was my responsibility to give Harry what he wanted in order for him to forgive me.  
**Author's notes:** Originally written for the 2011 **dudley_redeemed** banner by **aigooism** .

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**Forgive the Unforgivable**

Every time is the same. As soon as I open the door and I see him standing there, meek and at least a head shorter than me, reminding me of the eleven-year-old child I used to push so easily at school, and I cannot help but think "_if Dad only knew_". Suppressing a chuckle, I slide to the side and open the door wider, letting him into my immaculate flat in London. Old habits die hard. Even after almost eight years of not talking to my mother, I cannot stand living in a pigsty.

"Hey, Big D," Harry whispers, and I clutch at the doorknob more tightly.

"Another fight?" I guess, already knowing too well the cause of his visits.

Our reconciliation had taken its time, of course. After all, getting over such mistreatment was no easy thing. Thankfully, Harry was mature enough to forgive what I learned should be unforgivable. Over ten years after seeing him save the world from some crazy magician, I reached a level of maturity I had never thought I'd be capable of achieving. And, despite the sadness it gave me to be forced to turn my back on my obtuse parents, I started working towards gaining a peaceful conscience and a new sense of morality.

Alright, maybe my conscience shouldn't be so peaceful and my "morality" would make most people sick to their stomachs, but I could fix a mistake I _had_to fix. It was my responsibility to give Harry what he wanted in order for him to forgive me.

This silent agreement was not his condition to grant me the opportunity to redeem myself, though. No, Harry is too noble for that. Again, his nobility may be questioned by others in some aspects, but when it came to being the bigger person… yeah, that's just how Harry is.

"Yes," he says with a sigh as he drops himself on the couch and grabs his messy hair in tight fists.

"It'll be alright," I say, trying to comfort him just like I do every single time he knocks on my door.

He bites his lower lip and there's something in his expression that makes this situation a bit different from the others, throwing my familiarity with the procedure to the bin.

Normally, he would start pacing around my living room, telling me what Ginny did or didn't do. His voice would get louder and louder as the heat of his discussion with his wife resurfaced, until suddenly he would stop in his tracks, look right into my eyes and throw himself at me. That's the moment when I automatically forget about everything. Sometimes I wonder if I could answer a simple question such as, "What's your name?".

However, all too soon, it all ends and reality hits me like a truck. "I have to go back to my wife," he says, followed by an awkward "thanks", before he leaves my flat once more as I lay naked on my bed, trying not to breathe in the scent of sweat and sex he left on my sheets.

This time, the expected tantrum didn't come and I now have my expectant, twitching cock to deal with and I have a suddenly unpredictable cousin on the verge of tears on my couch.

"Harry?" I say tentatively.

"What are we doing, Dudley?" he whispers against his palms, making it extra hard for me to make out his words.

I wish I didn't understand him because now I feel my stomach churn as I hear the question I had been trying to avoid asking myself for the first time. Lacking for words, I fix my eyes on the floor. There's a small patch of dirt I must have missed when I cleaned this morning. My hands shake as I hold back the urge to clean it up. It is not important. This is not the time. I know the dirt is not what I should be focussing on right now. I owe Harry an answer; I wish I had one. My mind screams at me, "You know what you're doing! Shagging your cousin into oblivion searching for an I-forgive-you that you don't deserve!", but my lips refuse to let them out. Instead, they crave to shut him up with feverish kisses.

"Ginny thinks I'm cheating on her," he continues.

I tear my eyes from the floor and look at him in surprise. "Thinks?" My voice sounds like I am choking.

He bites his lip so hard I think it might start bleeding. "With another woman."

"Oh," I say, but the sound is practically non-existent, barely louder than a breath.

I don't know why this upsets me so much. However, I cannot help but repeat Harry's words in my mind over and over again as I turn around and leave. He calls my name, I know he does, but my brain won't process it. I simply go to the cabinet by the counter on the far end of my incredibly neat kitchen and grab the vacuum cleaner.

Once I'm back in the living-room, I see Harry standing and looking at me confused. "Dudley, what are you doing?"

"Cleaning. It's driving me crazy."

The sound of the vacuum cleaner disguises the silence in the room and the loud screams in my head. Despite the soothing feeling that getting rid of the dirt gives me, my focus is still on Harry, on his bright, green eyes staring at me, on his uneven breathing, on his fingers moving as if they were restraining from doing something.

"Dudley," I hear over the humming noise in the room. "Dudley, please."

I ignore him. I _have to_get the carpet clean. One thing in my life needs to be in order and under my control. But, suddenly, the vacuum stops and I feel his arm slide around my waist. He presses his face against my left shoulder and I shudder as his hot breath reaches my skin through my perfectly ironed white shirt.

"I'm sorry," he mumbles as his fingers grasp my shirt.

My cock doesn't care about the wrinkles or the fact that I left the vacuum cleaner right where it was and didn't return it to its place in the cabinet by the counter on the far end of my incredibly neat kitchen. It just twitches against Harry's stomach as I walk him backwards to my room. "_I_am sorry, Harry. What about Ginny?"

"Shh, don't think," he whispers against my lips.

"This is a mistake." I choke at the words.

"Yes, it is."

Harry's breathy laugh ends as his hands pull my face down that half an inch that separated our lips. His tongue soon claims mine and a wave of heat travels over my body. I move us onto the bed and my hips thrust against his frantically.

"Do it," I gasp, not stopping my ministrations.

Harry takes out his wand and, in the blink of an eye, skin touches skin with every movement. Sometimes magic is not such a terrible thing. My pulsating cock gets even harder as it makes contact with his. Harry's magically lubricated hand wraps around our members, increasing the friction and my arousal.

I suck at his pulse point and find peace at his loud groans of approval. "C'mon, Big D," he all but screams. "I'll- 'M gonna- Come- I'm-" And I feel our come spread between our stomachs and my body shakes with the intensity of it.

I let my weight drop onto the mattress beside Harry. He whispers a word that sounds like Latin and the stickiness on my stomach fades. Magic can certainly be handy. Before either of us could recover our breath, Harry buries his face against my chest, taking his foggy glasses off. I place them on my bedside table making a mental note to clean them before he leaves. But now, I just want to enjoy the moment, wrapping my arms around him, and breathing the scent of his hair against my chin and the smell of sweat and sex in the room. My heavy eyelids become my enemy when all I want to do is take this in and bid my goodbye to my cousin, my lover and my best kept secret.

A kiss upon my temple wakes me up as he nuzzles my cheek tenderly. I jolt up as I see him already dressed and ready to go. The moment has come.

"I'm leaving. Thought you would want me to wake you up," Harry says, less embarrassed than usual. Maybe it's the weight lifted off his shoulders with the knowledge that he won't have to do this again.

I nod, keeping my eyes on the rumpled sheets. "This is goodbye, then, eh?" I mentally flinch as my ears hear the horrible attempt at sounding casual.

"Yeah, I guess so..." He puts his hands in the pockets of his jeans giving him a boyish look, despite his age. "But not for long. I'm free Thursday night. We can cook dinner when I get here, how's that?" I stare at him, lost for words in my surprise. "Great. You'll clean my glasses then," he says with a crocked grin.

"How'd you-?" Before I could finish, he had disappeared. "Magic's not _that_ great. Can't even clean those bloody glasses the right way," I mumbled as I bury under the covers for another hour of sleep.

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